It’s strange how the suicide of my cousin’s son is affecting me. I’m shaken in a way I didn’t expect. I feel it’s opened the door to Doubt, the door I’ve been keeping closed all month. I’m thinking I’ve gotten it all wrong. Nothing really happened to the little girl. Maybe she just felt she wanted some attention she didn’t get. Maybe when she grew up she fell into a deep depression and needed for an explanation for it and created stories in her head. Maybe there’s really nothing there. Maybe she’s really nothing at all. I don’t know why I feel this way. Maybe it’s that my issues are so trivial compared to those my cousin faces. I’m confused. I’m nothing. I’m tired.