That’s my question today. My husband is great. He’s very understanding. He sort of knows what is going on with me, but not fully. He doesn’t know any details. He knows about about Creepy Neighbor Alex. He doesn’t know about the others, just that there were others. He doesn’t know about my dad (I think, though he may suspect).

He never presses me for details but he does believe the more I can talk about things, the better I will end up feeling. He promises he will love me no matter what, and I do believe him. He’s always been very steady, one of the many things I treasure about him.

Should I just tell him about my dad? Should I wait until after our trip to visit family? I don’t want him to say anything to my dad or anyone in my family. But maybe he can be a good support during the trip. That’s just a side benefit though. Really what I feel I would gain by telling him everything–okay, maybe not everything, maybe just more than I have told him so far–is a deeper intimacy. But I am also afraid. He will still love me, yes, I believe it. But I fear he may still see me differently than he does now. Tarnished. Twisted.